Hey Mom

Hey Mom.

Remember when you used to make fun of the neighbour lady who said getting a dishwasher changed her life because now she could vacuum twice a day?

Remember how you used to say "Housework is for people who can't think of better things to do?"

Remember how you used to host all those big parties and Dad would disappear into the basement for three hours doing who knows what and we used to scramble around cleaning up and then you would say "One of you go outside and come back in and tell me what is the first thing you notice?" And whatever we would see is the thing you made us clean up next?

Remember that year I was away at school and I came home in March and you hadn't taken down the Christmas tree yet?

Remember how when I moved away and I would come home on weekends the first thing I did was clean out all the old food from the fridge that you and Dad never got around to eating?

Remember that time just after I got married and I was supposed to make chinese for dinner and you couldn't find the wok? Remember how mad I was? Because how can you lose a wok?

If you were still here, even if dementia hadn't taken you, I bet you would remember none of those things. Or maybe if I reminded you, you would get that distant look, and shrug and laugh and remind me you had better things to do than housework.

Just thought you would like to know that I just found some chickpeas in the back of the fridge that have been there since December. Along with the dip I made for my big Christmas party. And I haven't vacuumed in a month. And the first thing you would notice coming in my front door is the dirty floor or maybe the pile of books/minutes/notes on the piano or the pile of shopping bags I keep forgetting to take to the car. And I didn't move the box with the Christmas tree in it out to the garage until the day Elizabeth came home for Easter. I only moved it because I knew she would roll her eyes at me. And I honestly have no idea where my wok is. Maybe the laundry room like everything else I can't find.

Just thought you would like to know.  

Happy Mother's Day.